Great news!

As I said last time, life is always changing, and this time it was a good change.   Tonight when I was at work, Jillian called me to tell me that she made it into the Nursing Program at Mount Royal University.    What a relief!    I can honestly say we've been on the edge of our collective seats waiting for this crucial piece of information.    She checked this morning and she was still listed as 'conditional' but it all changed when she checked again this evening.    I'm so happy for her.   I know the next four years are going to be a challenge but this is what she wants and we are, over the moon, happy for her.

My Family

Life is constantly changing and mine is no different.    I worked yesterday and found out from my co-workers that my aunt Emma in Germany died.   What a way to find out eh?    The aunt I work with didn't tell me anything.    I quickly phoned home to get a hold of someone.   After several attempts I reached Jonathan.   I worried that if I didn't know perhaps no one else knew ... a good assumption, considering no one had told me about it.    Jonathan offered to call my mom and Uncle Wally.    I was grateful.    After he made the calls he phoned me back and said neither of them seemed to react or seem concerned.   Weird, I thought, but whatever.    I called Teresa on my break to let her know too.

I don't know exactly when I found out ... did Jonathan tell me at work or afterwards ... but my uncle Otto from Caroline, had called my mom to let her know.   My mom had called Uncle Wally to fill him in afterwards.   The exact date he called my mom s unclear.   My mom told Jonathan that she found out Saturday evening.  But when I talked to her on the phone around 8:00 yesterday she was confused and said she either got the call on Friday night or Saturday night.    I know it's splitting hairs but the timing is important to me.    If she found out on Friday or Saturday night, why did I have to hear it from the ladies at work on Sunday.   Why didn't anyone phone me?    I'm perplexed and upset.

The minute I found out, I immediately was concerned about everyone I figured didn't know either.   I got on the phone right away and told people.   Gosh, it's only right isn't it?    I was so worried that mom or uncle Wally didn't even know their oldest sister had passed away.    That brings me to the point, why the hell do I worry so much about doing the right thing when it's obviou,s to me, that no one else cares to do the same?

My mind is still reeling.    I know I have a crazy, stupid family.    I know that.   I've tried to wrap my mind around it, I've tried to heal it.    I've tried to ignore the depths of dysfunction.   But right now, it's all too much.   I'm feeling let down again.    I'm feeling like it can't be fixed and most of all, I'm feeling like I don't want to be a part of it.   Let them function on their own ... I'm so done.

August 12 Already

I can't even believe it's August 12th already.   Where does the time go?   I'm enjoying 5 days off in a row right now.   I worked the previous 7, all in a row with no break.   So needless to say, I'm really enjoying not going into work.    There is a down side to all this joy though, the weather.    It's been a crappy bunch of days.   Today, again, it rained most of the afternoon.    I have two more days off and I've got my fingers crossed that I will experience a little sunshine before then.

This summer in general hasn't been the best when it comes to the weather here in Calgary.   The best weather we had was when we were away on holiday in BC.    At least we can be very grateful for that.

Jillian is still waiting for her acceptance to come through for Nursing at Mount Royal University.   She has spoken to a few people there and they don't seemed concerned about it.   From they way they say it, she shouldn't worry about getting in.   Her school fees have been deferred until September 20th which is really great.    Jillian and I went to Vogue Uniforms and ordered her scrubs and bought her some nice scrub pants which thankfully she really liked.    I'm thinking she should go back and try to pick up another pair since she liked them so much.   Maybe we will but I'm leaving it up to her.

Jacob is starting Grade 9 soon and he's looking forward to it.    He is surprised that the time went so quickly from grade 7 to where is he now.    He mentioned that High School will go by just as quickly and then he will be out of school.    Yeah, he has that right, time moves quickly.   I think he has his head screwed on pretty good.   I'm hoping he will really keep on top of things and make himself proud.

As for me, I don't know.   Things  haven't changed for me at all.    I've looked into some classes for fall.   More special interest than anything.   I'm looking into a Raw Foods class and perhaps Photoshop Elements too.   They are two things that interest me and I think I should do it.    Tomorrow I'll look on-line and through the book again and make a definite decision about it either way.   I think I should be doing more ... I need to find something for me.    Lord knows nothing is just falling into my lap, I have to make it happen.

Summer 2010

This summer I thought I wasn't going to work as much.   But other than the vacation days I took, I've been working, working a lot.    I have to finish up my 7 days in a row on Monday and after that I don't think I'll work for a few days.   I'm tired of working.

There are quite a few things I haven't done this summer.    My garden has been flattened by a hail storm and I've sort of lost interest in it ... it looks horrible.    In fact, I haven't even looked at the garden at the front of the house in a couple of weeks.    That's not good, it's not me.  

We went to St. Albert for a family reunion on the August long weekend.  We stayed in James' trailer in Jeff's driveway for 3 nights.   It was generous of them to bring their trailer for us but 3 nights was a little long ... too long for a visit.   The reunion itself was pretty good.    Marge was stressed and of course Dawn was a stress ball too.    There were a lot of people at the reunion ... Marge's extended family, Dawn's extended family, Jared's in-laws and even Betty's mom was there.    It was a little disjointed and there seemed to be little family pods, not a real opportunity to mix or meet everyone.    I thought it was going to be a Van Dyke family reunion, so it was a little unusual to me.   But it was what it was ... what can you do?

I've been less happy, I'm in a funk and can't quite get myself out of it.   After work today I took a really long bath and read a book that Catherine (from work) loaned me.    It's not the best book but it's something to read.   I also had a long nap, or at least attempted to nap, it was really too hot to sleep.

Tomorrow I'm working again at 7:15 and the only good thing about that is the fact that I'm not starting at 6:45.   Uncle Wally is also going to come over for supper.   That will be nice.   We haven't seen Uncle Wally for a while and he's such a great guy.

There is less than one month left this summer and for the life of me, I have to get something going.   I have to get some things done and I have to get a little happier.